This year"s Conservative Party conference is proof of the key political paradox of our age. The Tories now have, for the first time since 1987, a set of bright, shiny, sensible policies, all of which should also prove popular. And they have 'a message' - freedom and choice.
But the party, and its leaders, still look as if they come from another planet. To enter the conference hall is to enter a world in which sixty is young. The cut away shots on TV of pensioners sitting half asleep dilute almost all the impact made by some strong speeches - most notably David Willett"s thoughtful contribution yesterday.
Labour, in contrast, was elected in 1997 with barely a policy to its name; its main figures, however, looked normal.
In fact, the new Tory policies are not that far removed from Labour - they are a logical development of what Labour has aleady begun (there is already an NHS opt out under Labour, and David Miliband's speech yesterday at Brighton College was about letting new schools start up).
The truth, however, is that policies alone do not a winning party make. And when it comes to looking normal, the Tories are not even in first gear yet.
The word on everyone's lips in Bournemouth is 'modernise'; Teresa May, Damian Green, Liam Fox, David Willetts et al. "Yes", they say; "having policies is not enough. As a party we need to look modern and to modernise our structures". But the word is a meaningless slogan - the Tory equivalent of Blair's use of 'bold'. The two parties both mouth their respective mantras as if somehow there mere mention of it is evidence of some great achievement. But when Labour modernised the word meant something because it was code for a clear agenda for change in a planned, identifiable direction. Not so for the Tories, who still don't have a clue what to do to 'modernise' their party. Theresa May"s speech was , indeed, quite something. But saying you look like a bunch a weirdoes is easy: doing something about it proved difficult even for Tony Blair. We have yet to a word about the practical steps which self-proclaimed Tory "modernisers" promise to take.
The irony is that Labour and the Conservatives are using each other's words: the health, education and welfare policies revealed this week are 'bold'; and it's Labour which, as a party, has 'modernised'.



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